My Breaking Point

“It’s an odd thing, when your body says no and your mind and your spirit say yes. It’s frightening and empowering and clarifying and beautiful all at once. It was the past year of my life, shortened into a span of 26.2 arduous miles. It was the culmination of experiences, the knowledge that my body can be pushed past its breaking point, just like my heart. ” — Kristin Armstrong

This quote brings up some very personal feelings. It takes me back to Nov. 5, 2006.

As I stumbled through the finishers’ area of the NYC Marathon, I realized, the last 26.2 miles that I just endured was my breaking point. I am broken.

Normally, in a marathon, when my body starts to fail, my heart kicks in and picks up the slack. I had never run a race with a broken spirit, so I wasn’t prepared for what happened to me that day.

I trained for the marathon, I did all of the runs required to get through the miles. Did I train well? No. But without my heart, none of it mattered anyway. They say that running is 99% mental, and believe me, it’s true. It started at mile 17, and I could almost feel the pieces of me shattering. By the end, I knew I was at my end, and the only way around was through.

2006 was the year I went through my divorce and watched my entire family suffer. It was hands-down the low point of my life. I lost friends, confidence and a life I had worked hard to keep together. But it was time to heal — and rebuild. Ending that year with the NYC Marathon was the snap back to reality that I needed.

Looking back, I remember the pain. But I know I wouldn’t be where I am today without that experience. They say healing goes to the broken places first. Perhaps that explains my ridiculously big heart and unwavering spirit. And how I became the runner, mother, wife and friend I always wanted to be. -- Amie